What?!?!?! A Post?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Sup peeps? Anyone still out there? I am UPDATING!! HURRY COME READ! LOL
Sorry I have been gone for so long, it’s just that it’s Summer, and I have lots of stuff going on. If there was a way to blog from my phone (I need to check into that) I could update sooooo much more! But I am rarely if ever on the computer and that’s usually only long enough to check up on my myspace and my email. Speaking of email, you will find a meme entry from me soon because in my email box staring me in the face are the interview questions I asked for from Miss Mandylicious! LOL! So girl, I am working on it, promise!!
So recent events, my favorite way…
* JD and I passed the three years of wedded bliss mark last week. Three whole years! Hopefully this one is better than the last, hopefully a lot less stressful and a lot less scary! Although I am so happy that we made it to 3 years and I am looking forward to the rest of our lives. I love this man with all of my heart and in the past few weeks we have made great strides in our marriage (which honestly seemed to have been falling apart).
* I start working this week. Third shift baby, in one of my favorite places, downtown! I’ll be working in a club…well actually there are 4 clubs in one, but 1 of them is closed for remodeling. Regardless, it’s a hot place to work! Go me!
* All of my friends are either having babies, recently had babies, or have had babies for a while. I am going to be 28 soon, we have been married 3 years. Every time someone calls or emails to say, “Guess what? I am having a baby!” it just furthers my feelings of inadaquecy about giving JD a child to call his own. And it doesn’t help that he has been babysitting my friends kidlet who absolutely adores him and everyone keeps saying what a great father he will make. Folks, I don’t think I can have kids! It sucks and it’s hitting me hard, even harder tonight as another good friend just found out she’s having a baby! Although I am always happy for my friends, I just wish it was me!
Really I think that’s all the major updating I needed to do for the moment. Now I am off to work on this freakin’ interview questions I have been putting off for so long! So yeah, hopefully someone actually comes back to my blog in hopes of an update (yup, I am so gonna email my 3 fave *(read: only)* readers to let them know I actually updated!).
I hope to be writing more…mental note: check into blogging from my phone!
Oh and also Sudoku…I am freakin’ hooked on that game! That is all!
Insert witty title here…
Ok, so it’s still sitting in my drafts. It turns out that this whole baring of the soul will be a lot harder than I first imagined. And I have a lot going on right now, so I just don’t have the brain capacity to put into that kind of project. But I am still working on it, and you will all be reading it soon enough.
I had a really great weekend! On Saturday we went and spent a few hours with my Momma who I hadn’t seen in like ages. Seriously. It made her entire day! JD, Momma, my little brother Jake, and myself all piled into the car and went to Barnes and Noble. I love their bargain books and I walked out with 3 of them (and totally would have walked out with more if I could have). Then we went back to Mom’s and hung out for a bit. When we got home we snuggled in the bed, read and watched movies. It was a perfect Saturday.
Come Sunday we got up bright and early and headed over to my Dad’s house for a big family road trip! The Christmas present to all of us kids and grandbabies from Dad and Mary Jane (step-mom) was a day trip to Snowstar. It was a lot of fun for all of us. We spent the day on the tube hill, wow, talk about some SERIOUS fun!! I am not a thrill seeker by any stretch of the imagination, and after the first run down the hill I didn’t think I would be doing it again. It was scary, fast and I couldn’t stop and therefore got caught in the fence causing injury to my arm. However, I did it again and by the end of the day the whole family was getting a huge kick out of me because I went more than anyone else did. And I started going down on my stomach, and then spinning while on my stomach. Turns out I was the biggest thrill seeker out of the whole family. LOL! It was a great family day that we have decided to turn into a tradition. I can’t wait to go back next year. Although I hope I am not so sore next time from all the crashing and burning I did. LOL!
Today when JD got home from work we curled up and took a nap, mainly because we were both still pretty tired from the hours of fun in the sun and cold ass weather yesterday and both a little sore. It was a nice afternoon nap before doing laundry together. The only sucky part…my dreams. I have been having some seriously disturbing dreams lately. The kind that linger in your head long after you wake up. I won’t go into great detail about this one but suffice it to say it was pretty bad. I am still not entirely recovered from it either.
Alright, I am going to go snuggle under the blankets that are all freshly washed and smell so good and read my book and then crash out. G’nite and sweet dreams everyone!
Really, I do!
I want to blog, really, I really really do…but I can’t seem to find words. I’ll have a great idea for an entry, and mentally start writing it in my head, because there is never a PC accessible at that moment. But by the time I sit down here, and start to type, there is nothing. It’s like it all just wiped out in a flash. Blogging block, it blows! Almost sounds like a tongue twister.
So here we go with some Randomosity for ya….
*I had a dream the other night that I killed someone and then blew their head up in the microwave. It was disturbing, and worse my best friends man was going to turn me in and I was begging him not too. JD says I should have poked holes in the head first, it wouldn’t have blown. He’s sick (like I am not sick for having the dream) and now he thinks he is the one I killed because E, L and I were in it, but he wasn’t. Could be, don’t mess with me buddy! Haha! But really, it was disturbing, and what’s worse, I killed someone, cut off thier head and never felt ill, until the head blew up and I needed to clean the microwave, then I couldn’t stomach it. I have issues.
*Shaving is a dangerous job, especially when tired. I dropped my razor and instead of letting it fall tried to catch it and sliced off a big part of my fingernail and my skin underneath it. That effing hurts folks, and now it will be months before that fingernail is right again.
*Drinking is baaaaaaaaaaad….Jager is baaaaaaaaaaad. ‘Nuff said.
*Pink starbursts are the shit…they need to make a whole bag of just pink ones, I would so buy them all the time!
*The whole labret peircing thing I got going on is really bugging the shit out of me. I keep having issues with it (I have had it for 6 months, this shit should be HEALED), and I want to take it out. Problem: at least with it in you can’t see the hole, if I take it out I have to let this hole heal. I am not vain, but I am a little too vain to walk around with a hole in my face.
*Grey’s Anatomy…wow…’nuff said.
*Family trip this weekend to SnowStar, I have no winter coat, no boots, no hat, no scarf and gloves that weren’t meant for snow…yet I am still totally thinking about going anyway because how often do you get to snow tube and ride a “magic carpet” back up the hill? Besides, it’s all expense paid by my wonderful Pop and Step-Momma. I should go, right?
*I am not a religious person by any stretch of the imagination, as a matter of fact I consider myself Pagan (or something to that effect I guess), but I am reading The Confident Woman by Joyce Meyer that I got as a Christmas present from my MIL. It’s actually pretty good so far, even though I am not too big on the God references, overall, it has a really good message, not matter what your beliefs. Also, speaking of books, I am so getting a PostSecret book this weekend! I can’t wait!
Well, I guess that’s all for my Randomosity…until next time…toodles!
It’s in the Moments
So often we just rush through life, trying to get this that and the other thing done. Trying to get so much accomplished, trying to get more more more. More often than not everyone in this life is in such a hurry, that we forget to stand still and just appreciate the moments. Right now I feel like I am missing so many moments. The moments that I normally take for granted when JD is here with me. It’s funny how being apart will make you think of things like that.
For instance, we have a nightly ritual that’s all cute and cuddly that we do and have since the beginning of our time together. It’s something that we often do without thinking and it’s apart of what makes going to sleep so enjoyable for us. But at the same time, it is a ritual, it is fairly routine and when is the last time I stopped and just completely lost myself in that moment? Not to say I don’t love it, because I do, but I think Saturday night when we do it, I will make sure to clear my mind and put myself 100% into that moment so that I may savor it and truly enjoy it.
When it comes down to it, life isn’t about how much money we make, how many possesions we have, how high our status is, it’s about those little moments in life that truly bring us happiness. I am going to make a serious effort to start appreciating those moments more, I am going to lost myself in those little moments more. Those are the things that bring a smile to my face for no reason, that is what gives me hope, strength and happiness. It’s in the moments…it truly is.
Also, how awesome is my husband? I didn’t even tell him I wrote an entry with a message to him, but yesterday while he was at work he decided to check my blog. And then he left me an amazingly sweet comment. Ahh, just another one of those moments. It absolutely made my entire day yesterday. Speaking of him, he won’t be back on Friday afterall. They wanted to keep him there until Tuesday, but he said absolutely not, so he compromised and will be back Saturday. I am none to thrilled about this, because I am missing him really bad this week. More than the other 2 trips I think. I am just ready for him to come home…more than ready!
Cold…so very cold
Well we are officially getting the blizzard they have been calling for. It’s snowing like crazy, the wind is howling outside, and here I sit, alone in my room. If JD was in IL today he would be at home (everyone at work were told to stay home due to the weather), and it would be the perfect afternoon to stay in our PJ’s and snuggle up to watch TV. Maybe drink some hot chocolate, pop some popcorn and just be…together.
As much as I hate cold, snow and wind, days like today seem so romantic to me for the above reason. But instead of having that, I have a very melancholy outlook on it all. I miss him, I miss him like crazy. I want him to be here, I want him to have his arms wrapped around me, holding me, laughing, kissing, just being cute like we usually are on days like this.
I know this job is good, I know it’s good for our future, but I also know that it will take away so many of those moments. Sometimes I miss our simpler life, yeah we struggled with money, but we had some of the best moments. We don’t seem to get those moments anymore. They got lost somewhere in the race of life. So why is it if in this race he is going places, our future seems more secure than ever, yet somehow I feel like we are losing that race?
Simplicity…I miss it. I always thought we needed more, we both did…yet now I yearn for the days of simplicity. I yearn for the days where we didn’t have much, but we had each other and that’s all we needed. We were so happy then. Not to say we aren’t now, it was just…different.
Maybe it’s just because it’s only the 2nd day and I still have a few more to get through till he gets home (provided this blizzard doesn’t completely eff it up and he can’t come home on Friday either). I miss my husband, my soulmate, my best friend, and today is really hard.
I hate hard days…I really do. I wish I could close my eyes and open them and JD would be here, he would take me into his arms and kiss me like I have never been kissed. I wish I could open my eyes and just get lost, completely lost in his beautiful blue eyes. JD, I know you’ll read this at some point down there….I miss you so much, and I love you with everything that I am. Come home soon, and come home safe.
Only the lonely…
Well I have managed to make it through the first 8 hours of lonliness…
just not so sure about the next 93 hours.
I miss him like crazy already, I keep smelling the t-shirt he wore to bed
last night. He sprayed his cologne on it, so it smells like his cologne
and his shower-fresh self!
I sent him a text message earlier, and he didn’t get it. It said,
“I think I would feel less lonely if I were completely alone while
you were gone, now there’s a thought”, and he definitely didn’t get it
and I really just wanted him to understand what I meant. Maybe he hasn’t
had a chance to really think about it yet. Maybe later when I have a chance
to talk to him I’ll explain it to him.
Is it Friday yet?
Meanwhile go to my twitter and read my sad updates about how
much I miss my baby! LOL! Then sign up and add me as a friend so I can read
yours. Seriously, it’s rather addictive, kind of like myspace! LOL
Stress…a nasty 6 letter word
I hate that word. I loathe it’s very existance. Why? Because I am a crazy stressed out person by nature. Big things, little things, all things stress me. It’s going to snow 3 inches, I am stressed out about my loved ones having to drive on crappy roads, the truck breaks down, I am stressed about the expense and lack of a vehicle for days. It doesn’t matter what the crappy sitch is, it’s going to STRESS ME OUT!!!!!!!
What happens when this random girl gets stressed? She gets oh so effing cranky! And really (and I am sorry to male readers) but when you’re on your period, stress is a much bigger problem…especially when you are already super cranky that week by nature. Guess what folks? This is NOT MY WEEK!
And what makes an already crazy stressed out me even more stressed out, when the hubbyman starts stressing. Let me first tell you this, JD is laid back by nature. Seriously, he is my ever optimistic (to the point it pisses me off when I am stressed) “everything will work out just fine”, glass half-full husband. Usually I want to pummel his face for this…lol…ok not really, but you are catching my drift right? Well not today my friends. Today my dear, wonderful, eternally optimistic husband…was PESSIMISTIC! Shocked? I was too! His stress load finally took it’s toll on him, and he is visibly shaken by it, and being quite the negative nelly (helloooooooooooo baby, thats my job!).
So what do I do? I sit down on his lap, give him a big hug, and tell him everything is going to be just fine! Can we say role-reversal here? And when I am stressed (and I am, just as much as he is) I HATE THAT PHRASE!!!! IT IRKS ME WHEN HE SAYS IT!!!! LOL! So what do I do? I give it to him. Then I remind him about how we have been made it through worse and come out stronger….and we will be just fine. We just have to remember to stick together and be there for each other and everything will work out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Speaking of working out, they started the truck!! Yay!! That means one major stress is FIXED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) I gave him a great pep-talk and then an amazing romatical kiss, and a big hug and just held him. I hope it made him feel better, I know he was shocked to see me in the role he normally plays. And now that the truck is running (again, GREAT NEWS!) I bet he comes in here in a great mood!
The moral of this post? Stress is my nemesis. It always has been, but in seeing my husband so stressed out and having to take the role of moral support, make him feel better, try to remain positive spouse, I learned a lesson. It’s all about how you deal with it, look at it, handle it. If you DON’T let it get you down, DON’T let it consume you, DON’T let it frazzle you, DON’T let it affect you physically…you come out standing quite a bit taller and quite a bit stronger. And sometimes something that stressed you out so much (like the truck) works out so well that you think to yourself, why was I so damn stressed about that anyway? So today…I look at stress a bit differently…and I hope that it sticks with me for a while. I can handle it…I am tough, right?
Now, I hope I haven’t jinxed the truck! LOL!
***ETA*** In all the hits on this entry that I got, noone even noticed my typo, it said stress is a 5 letter word, I just fixed it to say 6 letter word. LOL!
OK…the dream is still coming…
I promise I’ll blog it tomorrow…
I am tired…got up early…had a full day,
Sleep sounds sooooooooooooo good right now.
Did I mention I hate midwest winters?
It’s so effing cold here right now….
2 fireplaces roaring, the furnace running…
And my fingers, toes and nose feel like ice,
I am shivering….
IT’S SO EFFING COLD!!!!!
So, I am going to snuggle up to my WARM SLEEPING HUSBAND!
(I love that he puts off so much body heat…
when he goes to bed before me the bed is always warm…
and I can snuggle up to him and if he’s in a deep sleep my cold body don’t wake him up…haha)
Tomorrow…the dream…maybe some other fun stuff…
TGIT
Two posts in 2 days…
Damn I am good!
TGIT!!!! Thank Goodness it’s Thursday!
Know what that means?
KARAOKE!!
E tends bar at our fave Karaoke dive on Thursdays…
I always accompany her
It’s in the ghetto…and noone gets in there until about 8…so for 2 hours it’s a little freaky…
So I am the bodyguard…I mean who would mess with me? LOL!
It’s fun though, we jam the jukebox, play cards,
talk, laugh, and hear every damn noise imaginable.
And it’s our one night a week out of the house! Yay!
Today I am ready for it…God love the man, but JD is driving me BONKERS!
We go a few days of getting along fab…
and then he irks me…and it’s a constant irk…
He doesn’t mean to…he just annoys me! LOL!
So with that, I must get my arse in gear for Thursday night…
THANK GOODNESS IT’S FINALLY HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PS…I very rarely get more than tipsy either as I am the DD…plus I don’t like hangovers! LOL!
Merry Christmas..Happy New Year..and then some!
Yikes, it’s been a day or two since I have been in here huh? I had to push away some of the dust bunnies and cobwebs just to even start writing this entry. And it’s so quiet around here…hopefully ya’ll will start coming back with the hopes of a new entry in the New Year! LOL!
So a belated Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you!! The holidays are always a crazy time, and blogging just wasn’t high on the priority list for the last month or so. I had a lot of Christmas gifts to crank out, we did a lot of family stuff, and well, I have just been enjoying life.
Jamie did make it back safely from SC. I have never been so glad to have him back. It was a hard week, I really missed him. And then to start the new year off right, on New Years day we were all out to eat when my cell phone rang (it’s 7:30 pm mind you) and they tell him he is leaving again for SC in 9 hours. So he agreed to go since they told him he would only be there for a few days and they would fly him home first thing Sat. morning. Not going to happen, he didn’t end up coming back until Monday, and they drove instead of flew…so he actually didn’t get home until 1:30 AM Tuesday. And he might have to go back next week again. This is really starting to piss me off because this wasn’t in the job description, they told him a week of training in SC, that’s it….they never told him they would be sending him down there to work. He hired on for a job in IL, NOT SC!!!! I am really starting to hate his job…for that reason, among other things. But the other things don’t need to be discussed here. LOL!
Other than that, not really much going on. Today is our 4 year anniversary (not our wedding anniversary, that’s 3 years in June!). Jamie brought me a heart-shaped box of Dove Chocolate Truffle Hearts…and a card. Made my day! And Dove chocolate is my absolute favorite, and I love me some truffles! This man absolutely melts my heart!
He also got me a belated Christmas present, my very own laptop! Ahhh, and I am loving this thing!! I am portable now, I can roam wherever I want! Oh yeah baby!! I love electronics. LOL! And I have given over my desktop to Jamie, it’s his to do what he wants with, as soon as I get all my crap on it saved.
Also, E and I are doing our scraproom. Most of our stuff is in there right now, but we haven’t started setting it up because we plan on painting it. Her Mom, being the awesome woman that she is, bought us these really cool craft tables to use. And we are also sharing the room with her youngest daughter who loves to scrapbook and do crafts as much as we do. So it’s actually our “craft room”.
Well thats about it for me. I’ll try to update more often now!! Toodles!
